http://www.carlkingcreative.com/10-myths-about-introverts One of my lead actors has a sore throat. I go out of my way to pour him another cup of tea and tell him that if he does not drink it I will knock his lights out. I am a machine that converts junk food into complex mathematics. "You seem to have that mix of chemicals that makes you susceptible to this art form [theatre]. And for that I give you my deepest condolences" -Fisher I like the French, because they have a committee to preserve the purity of their language. When Life Hands You Lemons... ...Eat Coconuts! ...Hand Them Back. ...Make Apple Juice. ...Demand Limes! ...Say, "Thanks, What Else Ya Got?". ...Make Orange Juice and Wonder What Happened ...EAT THEM STRAIGHT! I enjoy the face you make. ...Throw them back and scream "NO! I WANT CANDY!" ...Stand there confuzled and say "Why the hell would i want LEMONS? I mean REALLY!!!" ...These oranges are surprisingly sour. ...make lemonade, and then throw it in the face of the person who gave you the lemons until they give you the oranges you originally asked for ...Just shut up and eat the damn lemons ...paint Minnesota gold? ...wake up, it's a nightmare ...throw them back and say "Sorry, I'm allergic to cats." ...Give them back. Didn't your mother ever teach you not to take food from strangers? ...unless it also hands you water and sugar your lemonade is gonna suck. ...make orange juice and let life suck on that. ...consider the local economy and success of a corner lemon stand. ... throw them back and say 'Make your own lemonade' ...make apple juice 'cause it's better ...throw them back and ask for chocolate ...throw them at people who have expensive cars ...say "Fuck the lemons" and bolt ...make lemonade. Then what do you do with kumquats? ...throw them at Hannah Montana ...it's saying "I thought I'd give these to you, loser" ...say "Oh, well." ... ask for tequila and salt ...sell them on Ebay ...eat them. Seriously, free lemons. ...clone them and make superlemons ...start a food fight ...throw them back and ask for cookies ...find an obnoxious kid with a papercut ...throw them back and ask for cookies When god hands you lemons you find a new god.